Travels without Tatum

August was a huge months of firsts - not for Tatum, but for me.  This month I traveled on my first business trip to Sacramento for a tree conference.  This three day conference counted as the first time I had ever spent a night away from Tatum.  Geez!  The little lady is two, and every night for the past two years she has awoken to me in the morning.  During a moment of mothers' guilt I changed my three-day ticket to a two-day and ended up only spending the night in Sacramento.  Which proved to be a wise choice since the conference was hosted at a university and housing was in the dorm rooms.  My dreams of sleeping on six pillows and soaking in a hot tub vanished as I made my extra long twin bed and put on the case to the provided plastic pillow.  I returned home the next night after Tatum had gone to bed.   In the morning she awoke, called my name, and we continued on as usual for a Friday.   I must say that toddlers are a bit like dogs in this respect: they miss you when you are gone and once you return they can't remember that you had left. 

So, the following weekend I joined two friends of mine who I met 10 years ago during my study abroad experience to India.  We traveled the coast to Big Sur and camped in the Los Padres National Forest high above the marine fog layer that is famous in Big Sur.  Yes, and this trip was without Tatum and Andrew.  When I was first invited to attend I kindly turned down the offer.  It wasn't even in my head that I could go without my family.  My friends continued to urge me, and realizing that it had been 10 years, I talked with Andrew about the trip.  He quickly said, "Go, you don't even have to ask.  You should go."  Partnership is amazing. 

The morning before I left I was helping Tatum to breakfast.  She asked for dada's cereal, which I got for her and poured milk into.  Tatum whined that she did not want the milk.  So I got another bowl and filled it with cereal minus the milk.  She continued to show dissatisfaction.  I asked her what was wrong, momma had listed to Tatum that she did not want the milk so I poured her another bowl.  She then turned to me and said "momma no bye bye" and crawled into my arms for a long hug.   I reassured her, no matter where momma goes, I am still your momma.  And momma always comes back for Tatum. 

Rhonda and I near San Simeon, CA among the Elephant Seals

My Purse, I Need My Purse

For Tatum's second birthday her La La gave her a princess purse.  This princess purse has gone from a dismissed item in the toy box to a necessity when leaving the house.  "My purse! My purse! I need my purse!" is a commonly heard cry.  It is now a part of the items taken daily to preschool.

Where does her preoccupation with the purse come from?  Me, I guess.  Or it may be a learned behavior.  Who knows. I do carry a bag. I have a work bag/purse that goes with me Monday through Thursday to work.  And now that I think about it, besides my own middle school phase with Liz Claiborne purses, I didn't carry a purse per say until last year when bought one as a thirtieth birthday present to myself to use after work hours and on the weekends.  And I do love it .  So I totally get it.  The girl needs her purse.

It has taken Tatum the course of a month or so to properly cock her shoulder to hold the purse.  Ladies, you know what I am talking about, there is a manner in which one must hold their shoulder to accommodate for a purse.  So after seeing her repeatedly reset the purse to her shoulder after it repeatedly falling to her elbow, she's now got it, mostly.  Sometimes she'll give up and just carry it by the strap.

And what's in the purse you may ask? A plastic ball, a shoe from her baby (the other shoe is missing), a rattle toy from the toy box, and a wooden egg: the play necessities for a busy two year old!

So, a purse story...We've gotten into the habit of grabbing a vanilla cone at McDonald's on Mondays (you can't beat the $.69 price) and then playing on the slides in the play structure.  This week she asked for some water.  I asked another mother to keep an eye on her while I stepped away to get the water.  Tatum soon was heard yelling "my purse!", grabbed her purse, and followed behind me.  It made the mothers and myself laugh.  The girl needs her purse.

She also fell getting out of her chair, not for the purse, but to go slide, and bloodied her lip.  You can see it in the pic.  You can also see her right front chipped tooth.  Yep.  That happened a few weeks ago getting out of the pool and not using the ladder (lesson learned).  I had a hand in it, I must admit.  And funny (or not so) thing is I also chipped Andrew's tooth in the first months of dating in college.

I Want Bath

      

I never know what an evening will hold when parenting a toddler.  But what I have learned is when I child asks for something, and I can reasonably accommodate their request, I do.  Such is the case with the bath in the sink, which was an inspired act to play with the dishes (at least the non-breakable ones!).

Summer Time = Swimming Time

Swimming is my favorite part of summer, and this year Tatum is just big enough to safely enjoy the pleasures of the local public pool.  The only way to enter in or out of a public pool is via the ladder (or jumping), there are no steps and the "shallow ends" starts at 3 feet.  She tends to hang out on the ladder, climbing up the ladder, stepping to the side and jumping into my arms from the side. 

A happy swimmer needs snacks on the return trip home!

Our first visit to the pool this summer was an experience in setting limits.  A month before Tatum received a towel as a birthday gift, which she adores.  We started our pool experience, as we do every time, by laying our towels out by the pool and then going over to the water and getting in.  Tatum developed a pleasured habit of getting out of the pool, going to her towel, straightening it or laying down on it, then returning to the pool.  At one point she insisted that I too join her on this back and forth adventure, so I did.  What I realized was that she was trying to get me out of the pool so that she could get in by herself.  Two is the age of fierce autonomy, and I try to support it as much as I can while remaining safe.  So, as Tatum insisted through her communication that I stay out of the pool, I squatted at the water's edge and watched her go down the ladder and jump in.  I must say that is quite brave, but a bad idea when you can't swim.  Immediately I was in the water and picked her up and out of the water.  Tatum was only under for a moment, but enough to experience that she needed her mom to swim.  I held her as she cried and wiped and the water from her eyes explaining that babies need their mommas in the water so that we can keep our little ones safe.  She agrees.

This happened in June, but we've continued to return to the pool at least once a week when it is hot. 

Expecting Good News...

Our trip home in May resulted in more surprises than we could have ever asked for - on Tatum's birthday we found out that we were going to give her the best present of all, a new sibling!  That is right, we are pregnant and expecting our second child in January 2011.

So Tatum was our Belly Bean, and this new little life's in utero name is Tummy Nut.  We are parents who plan, so we expect to find out if Tummy Nut is a boy or girl in the next few months. We also expect to find out if it is a singleton or twin in two weeks... but we're just going to assume now there is only one.    In the mean time, I thought it would be fun to post a poll on Tatum's new sibling... brother or sister? 

Tatum has already taken to the idea of momma having a baby.  She knows the babe is in my tummy, growing every day.  At night sometimes she will lean over, pull up my shirt and kiss my belly saying "hi brother" - so yes, Tatum is thinking it's a boy; but we think sister is just too hard to say.